New Blog...

I haven't had a blog in exactly a year. Well, I've had a blog, but I haven't posted in a year. Big difference, seriously.

I saw a Youtube video today. It was Everything by Mark Shultz. It made me cry and think.

I had some trouble coming up with a blog name. Finaly I just decided to take two of my favorite things which aren't 1. things that were really created for 5 year olds (ie. Disney Princesses) and 2. had nothing to do with a nickname, a name that's not actually mine though I wish it was, and a name that wasn't taken. So...Autumn Skies and Oak Trees. I have an obsession with trees lately. It started about twoish weeks ago when it was raining and I was depressed. I just wanted more than anything to get away and feel like everything in the world wasn't going to swallow me alive. And so I climbed a tree. In the pouring rain (pouring for so cal, anyhow). And than I realized what I've been missing in the six years since I last climbed a tree. And than I started climbing trees with people and wow. The best conversations happen in trees. Plus you kind of feel like a bird. And autumn skies...well...I love the sky.

I've had a lot of drama in the last few weeks and the only thing that I can really say is: I stink at communicating. Out loud. On paper, I'm okay. Writing is my forte. But anyhow, I stink at saying what I actually mean. I stink at saying anything close to my true feelings to anyone in the world except one person who I've known for five years. And I came to the realization that if I can't actually say what I feel that's gonna cause a crapload of problems in any relationship. Yesterday I asked one of my teachers if he'd never been so angry that he'd screamed and yelled. And he said something like 'Doesn't everyone?'

I can't remember the last time that when I was incredibly frustrated I actually did something about it.